What does it mean to be a caretaker?

I’m not a “green” person. I don’t worry about how I can conserve more energy, how I can avoid needlessly filling landfills, or worry about the ozone being destroyed. And yet, I have been inundated with articles about good stewardship and what it means for us to be Christians and live on the earth. I’m much more the type of person to worry about people, but I am feeling convicted lately. In the beginning God created the world and it was perfect. He then entrusted his perfect world to humans to care for. If a mother were to entrust her precious child to me I would not treat said child like I treat the earth. I am beginning to believe that it is my responsibility to care for the earth in a similar manner as I care for people. I’m not sure what all I can do though. I would greatly appreciate your suggestions/ideas! Here are a few things I have been doing/am starting to do:

1. Combine trips and accelerate slowly to conserve gas.

2. Do not leave the water running the whole time you are brushing your teeth/washing hands.

3. Use cloth/re-usable shopping bags.

4. Use both sides of a piece of paper.

5. Recyle.

6. Replace your light bulbs with the new florescent kind.

It seems like a pretty pathetic list to me. So help me think of ways to be a better steward of this land God has entrusted to us!

Rain like grace

It’s raining outside. I love the rain. I love the sound and the smell and even the feeling of it as it soaks me. I love rain because it provides much needed water for plants to allow them to grow, and because it helps clear the streets of the oil build up. I love rain because it buys me more time before needing to wash my car, and because it takes away some of the humidity. I love the rain because it is a sign of God’s grace. I am reminded of a worship song that I’m actually not all that fond of- Grace Like Rain. It’s a great metaphor for grace. Grace comes into our lives and there is no avoiding it- try avoiding every drop of rain that falls-and we get drenched in grace. Grace comes into our lives and allows us to grow. Grace takes away all the bad that has built up in our lives and gives us a clean slate to move forward. Grace takes away some of that haziness and replaces it with a more clear understanding. So yes, rain is like grace. And today as it rains I’m reminded of all the ways grace touches me, all the ways grace is an integral part of my being, all the ways grace gives me the ability to live. And next time it rains, I will again be reminded of this. I’m not sure when this recognition first started for me, but it makes me love rain even more. The rainbow is a sign of God’s promises, rain is a sign of God’s grace. Today as I run through the rain I thank God for grace.

Seeking Justice…?

Justice. It’s everywhere around me right now. Kind of like I am in the eye of the storm and all around me swirls justice. A group of 600 (SIX HUNDRED!) illegal workers were taken away from a factory in a police raid that caused chaos that made some people think a bomb had gone off in the building. While these people were taken away the other plant workers APPLAUDED. When I read that my heart broke-seriously (Read about it here). I’m working with a college and a couple other youth leaderes to plan an area wide youth justice forum. Our first topic is about helping those in prison. A local organization is doing a sleep out event to raise homelessness awareness and raise money for helping the homeless obtain transitional housing. I keep getting slapped in the face by stories of how people have reached out and genuinely helped other people. I open my Bible and wham, there it is, more about justice. But what am I doing? How I am helping? Sitting in my comfortable house giving money to help a child in Africa. Giving money to help send a friend to Africa to do mission work. Giving money to support friends in Russia doing mission work. Giving money to the church to support their work. Giving money…is that really helping achieve justice? By giving money I am in a sense saying that I think I am better than them. It’s not going to be easy, it’s probably not going to be very fun either, but it is my goal that in the next month I find a way to truly seek justice. To truly serve another person. Oh boy.

***UPDATE***

So I have been following an interesting discussion on the immigrant story here. If you are at all interested in this story and how it relates to living as a Christian I encourage you to check it out. It has been very thought provoking for me.

The Church’s Confession

And now, our God, after all this what can we say for ourselves? For we have thrown your commands to the wind, the command you gave us through your servants. They told us, “The land you’re toaking over is polluted land, polluted with the obscene vulgarities of the people who live there; they’ve filled it with their moral rot from one end to the other. Whatever you do, don’t give yourselves to them in marriage. Don’t cultivate their good opinion; don’t make over them and get them to like you so you can make a lot of money and build up a tidy estate to hand down to your descendant.” And now this on top of all we’ve already suffered because of our evil ways and accumulated guilt, even though you, dear god, punished us far less than we deserved and even went ahead and gave us this present hope. Yet here we are, at it again, breaking your commandments by wooing the world, the people who practice these obscenitities! Are you angry to the point of wiping us out completely, without even a few stragglers, with no way forward at all? You are the righteous GOD of Israel. We are right now a small band of followers. Look at us, openly standing here guilty before you. No one can last long like this.

Aah, the desert

It is not entirely uncommon to hear about the mountain top experiences Christians experience. Whether it be a retreat, camp, service trip, significant life event, or something else it seems like people are often talking about how close to God they felt during that time. And of course if there are mountain top experiences then there have to be those low in the valley experiences as well. The times when you feel like God is so far away you can’t connect. To me the valley isn’t so bad. From the valley you can still see the mountain. From the valley you can still see where you have been and where you are going. You may be frustrated at the climb ahead but the hope for what is next is still there. What I don’t hear that much about is the desert. To me the desert is the worst place to be. In the desert you don’t have the nourishment of the valley or the hope of seeing the mountain. In the desert it is you and a whole lot of nothing. In the desert you can do only one thing- get down on your knees and beg God to bring you out. Aah, yes. The desert is wonderful for this. On the mountain you are close to God, in the valley you see what lies ahead, but the desert is where you learn to truly rely on God. Jesus had this experience in the desert as well. He spent 40 days in the desert and then had to endure temptation after all that. He had to trust that God would provide for him, that God wasn’t going to leave him, even in this desolate wasteland filled with temptation. And after he endured this Jesus still chose to return on occasion to the desert. I don’t think this was an accident. The more time he spent in the desert the closer he drew to the Father. I think it was because of his desert experiences that when the time came for him to ultimately sacrifice himself on the cross he knew what he was facing. He knew the desolation and loneliness he was going to face. He knew that the Father was not going to abandon him in his greatest hour of need. This is why I don’t lose hope when I am in the desert. This is why the desert has become a place of joy just like the mountain top. Yes, it is frustrating and I spend the time in the desert working toward the mountain. Jesus never went to the desert as to stay, and we should not be content in the desert either. The desert is not a destination, but it is a place all travelers must pass through to get to the destination. And it is a formative part of the journey. I’m nearing the edge of the desert, I can see the lush valley before me, the faint outline of the mountain in the distance. And I am ready to move forward, to keep going, to be nourished. But I am grateful to my Father for walking me through the desert, for bringing me through a place that forces me to rely on him for my every need. God didn’t give the Israelites manna when they had arrived in the Promised Land, he gave them manna in the desert. God didn’t provide water from a rock in the Promised Land he provided it in the desert. When we can’t rely on our own devices, we open ourselves up to allow God to work miracles and wonders in our lives that he cannot do when we are in a safe place, in a place where we believe we can take care of ourselves.  So, no matter how frustrated I get by the dry spells, by the desert land. I am grateful to my Lord for not allowing me to live only in the valleys and on the mountain. And I am grateful that he continues to bring me out to the desert when I get too content in myself.

What about gossip?

The Barna Group just released a study on Mosaics (young adults) and moral issues. It bothers me. First of all, over a quarter of young adults admit to doing one or more of these morally wrong things- although the number of evangelicals (active Christians) engaging in these behaviors is substantially less. What really bothers me is that only 26% of Mosaics say they have gossipped in the last week while 38% have had sex outside of marriage. I feel we must have a very loose definition of gossip if this is true. Either that or it has become socially accepted to have sex outside of marriage but not to gossip. Either way, it is troubling to me. What is gossip? Isn’t gossip any talk of another person’s behaviors and/or goings on in another persons life? Or is gossip only gossip if the talk is malicious or harmful to the person being talked about?

My Confession

I’m sorry for believing my desires are better than yours.

I’m sorry for choosing destruction over you.

I’m sorry for finding pleasure in things of this world instead of you.

I’m sorry for making Christ die.

I’m sorry for putting you in a box.

I’m sorry for running from you.

I’m sorry for shrinking you to fit my wants.

I’m sorry for choosing sin.

I’m sorry for failing as a leader.

I’m sorry for not worshipping you.

I’m sorry for taking the easy way.

I’m sorry for hating people.

I’m sorry for judging others.

I’m sorry for being selfish.

I’m sorry for being scared.

I’m sorry for filling my mind with things opposing you.

I’m sorry for caring more about the unreal than the real.

I’m sorry for not desiring you.

I’m sorry for not knowing if my heart is truly in this apology.

Worship

The first night of youth group this year our topic is worship. My professor in college taught what I can only assume many others teach as well- that you should spend a lot of time in the text just meditating on it before you begin planning your lesson. Well, I didn’t have a specific text in mind so I looked up worship in my concordance and ended up reading about the building of the Temple. Talk about a lot of rules. I was reminded how easy it is for us to worship today compared to ancient Israel. They had to go to the Temple, wash, only the men could enter, only a priest (who went through a 7 day long anointing process) could offer the sacrifices, only the priest could enter the Holy of Holies, and people didn’t go and worship falsely, at least not easily. Worship was a serious matter. It was a big deal. And I am so glad that I can worship God in a variety of ways and whenever, wherever I want. But I feel like we may have lost something important in the evolving of worship. I feel like with worship being this big process it’s not something a person would be doing apathetically. Hypocritically, sure, but apathetically? Probably not. I mean, you have to go through a cleansing ritual before you enter the temple. Other than my usual shower I’ve never cleansed myself before worship. They had to buy animals to sacrifice, or else take animals that would give them money to sacrifice for their sins. We have to ask for forgiveness, our sacrifice has been offered for us. They had to have a mediator between God and them, our mediator resides at God’s right hand. And I am so grateful, so glad that I don’t have to do all those things, but I sometimes wish we did just enough to be able to remind us what we are doing and what we have been given. How can I forget that I have repented of my sin and need to leave it in the past when I just gave up my best cow? How can I forget that God has taken my sin away and I am clean when I literally wash? How can I forget that their is someone who has taken my sin upon himself and now serves as a mediator between me and God when I am kept separate from God/him by a curtain? Yes, we are blessed with the privelage to worship God in the temple of our bodies, but let us not forget who we are worshipping and why we are worshipping him. Let us approach our worship as something more than the apathetic Sunday morning church service we so often settle for. Let us truly worship the almighty God.

A Dreamy Reality

It’s spinning out of control, the brakes aren’t working, and my screams and tears make no difference. The motor home that is. My grandparents have this huge motorhome. I have never driven it, but last night I had a dream that ensures I never will. I am riding with my grandpa, driving their giant motor home. Everything is going great when suddenly we are at a dead end road- a cul-de-sac with European style homes built close together and small- in fact, in my dream the houses were actually shorter than the motor home. I try to stop, but the brakes aren’t working. I am forced to continue driving in a circle at way to fast for the tiny space speeds trying desperately to get it to stop without crashing. I am screaming for my grandpa to help me and he is sitting relatively calmly trying to say something that I am totally not comprehending. It seems like forever that I am pressing the brake pedal and driving in circles in this monstrous vehicle, when finally my grandpa bends over in front of me and pulls out a pillow from beneath the brake pedal. I press the brake and we come to a stop. I woke up sweating and shaking and trying to convince myself that this dream that seemed so real a minute ago wasn’t.

But I am glad I had this dream. It is an analogy of my life at this moment. The brakes have been pushed finally, but now what? I was driving my own life and was stuck in a cul-de-sac of sin- one particular sin. I was stuck spinning in circles trying to stop and God kept reaching out to me, but it was only when I finally let go and gave God the room to pull out the pillow that things came to a stop. I wish the dream had continued with my grandpa taking over the driving or something hopeful like that. But it didn’t.  But it gives me hope anyway, because it offers me in a few minutes of dreaming the chance to reflect and realize that things have progressed. Change has been made, and the challenge now is to be willing to let God take over the wheel. This sounds so cliche and in most cases I would totally hate this, but it fits with my dream.
I don’t know that God talks to us in audible ways like conversing with another human being. But I have absolutely no doubt that God communicates with us in ways beyond our human understanding, and while not all dreams are necessarily God speaking to me, I think God still speaks to us in dreams just as he did in the Bible.

Starving Sin

I have been thinking a lot about putting to death that which is earthly in my life. I struggle with things of this world invading my life a lot- to the point that often I let them have too much space and too much control. After reading Colossians 3 I have been really convicted about this and struggling with how you actually put to death something that is so much a part of you. I decided the only possible way to do this is starvation. This may sound silly, and probably is from the part of my brain that thinks about teaching junior highers, but I am in a fairly literal sense attempting to starve the part of me that needs to die. What I mean is, no matter how desperately I want to give in, no matter how strongly I feel I HAVE to do it, I am refusing to let myself have it. And much like physical starving I would imagine, the more I deny myself, the more my self that is not as deeply rooted in Christ as it should be crys out for it and trys to get it. So, I am seeking ways to fill the void. Which is beautiful and good because I have forced myself to a place where all I can do is fill my mind and my longing with things of God or I will give in to the crys of my old self that I am trying to starve. I have found new ways to be with God, taking long walks and reflecting intentionally on something I see. Listening to music as an act of worship. Meditating on a single verse/phrase. Sharing. My hope is that I can starve my old self, that I can truly put it to death. It’s not easy, but it is wonderful.